Remembering China…
I distinctly remember the day sitting in church. It was “Global Spotlight” Sunday where a pastor from one of our partner countries would come each year and speak and have a team from their country lead worship music. It’s always such a treat. On that day each year we also receive a postcard that tells us of all the global mission trips scheduled for the year with our church. I’d been to Guatemala a few times when we adopted our daughter {read here} and had done mission work locally but never went on an official “mission trip”. That particular Sunday I was sitting next to my friend Jane {note: For as long as I’ve known her, we’ve never sat together at church before} as well as my hubby and hers. When we both looked at the postcard we turned to each other and were like “we’re going to China”. I know the Holy Spirit prompted this response from the both of us. We’d never talked about going on a mission trip, neither of us had any desire to go to China, I hate flying long distances {especially over water}, I can’t sleep in airplanes, I am a very picky eater, I like my hot breakfast and hot tea made just perfect every morning, I have A LOT of trouble sleeping away from home, my “digestive” system does NO cooperate when I travel, I like MY schedule, time changes turn me in to a monster {even an hour and this one is 12 hours!}, etc. so as you can see this sounded like a pretty stupid idea. We both turned to our hubby’s and told them we felt like we were being called to go to China. I am certain my hubby choked and then when he recovered from the shock of what I said, he reiterated everything I mentioned above that would lead any half sane person to the conclusion that it was an extremely bad idea. Like, not just a bad idea, but out of my mind crazy idea. I agreed, but I felt called right then and there and I couldn’t describe it any other way.
The prep to leave home for 17 days was unreal, even in the summer with the kids out of school. My 3 kiddos were ages 9 & 10, hubby traveled a good bit and had NEVER watched our kids for more than a 2-day weekend, he doesn’t cook and due to his travel schedule had no real idea where anyone needed to be on any given day or time. Him being left home with the 3 kids for 17 days was just as crazy of an idea as me going to Chine for 17 days. God was up to something and as usual, He has quite a sense of humor!
This trip in particular was to work at a school for special needs orphans. It was attached to the orphanage and while this was a Christian ministry, the Chinese government allowed this special arrangement due to the fact that they were rehabilitating these beautiful children to the point they were becoming adoptable. They really needed speech, feeding, physical and occupational therapists to join this team but they also needed moms to love on these kids and pitch in wherever needed. Jane and I were both adoptive mom’s and I had certainly done the therapists round with little dude and his medical journey {read here} for years so I figured I was just as qualified as anyone else! The next thing I know, my friend, Chrissy, {a.k.a. speech therapist extraordinaire} is coming too!!!!
After I wrote the 30 page binder of notes for hubby to take care of the kids {I’m not exaggerating}, it was time to depart and I was ready but anything but ready. Our first flight was from Atlanta to San Francisco…. No problem. When we arrived we learned of a delay on our connecting flight to Tokyo. It’s fine it was delayed but I didn’t need the repeated detailed announcements that there were mechanical issues with the engine. I figured that surely they would just get us a new plane with an engine that was 100% functioning and we’d be on our way…doesn’t that sound like the best course of action to you? Well, clearly DELTA had other ideas {that they didn’t seek my opinion on} like spending HOURS working on the broken engine and then ultimately, 8 hours later, stick 300+ people on it and fly for 12 hours-over water-… splendid. Reason #50 why this was seeming like a bad idea to go to China… bad enough I don’t like to fly but now I am getting stuck on a plane that earlier had a broken engine and I’m supposed to relax and enjoy the flight? I. think. Not.
Let’s talk about the “comfort factor” of being in economy class for 12 hours, shall we? You are doing anything you can to try to get comfortable… trying any possible position, none of which are anything but ridiculous looking as you try to figure out how to rest your head somewhere and not have your body on top of the person sitting next to you or hanging in to the aisle to get run over by the beverage cart. Now, many of the girls on our trip took their sweet little melatonin and drifted off to sleepy land with no issues. Good.For.Them and Curse. Them. I even caved in and took RX sleeping pills… desperate for some shut eye… when that didn’t work I added another kind and some melatonin and I was nothing but a wide eyed- ready to lose my mind- missionary sitting uncomfortably amongst masses of soundly sleeping passengers. Oh if you only could imagine the things I wanted to say. Sadly, in these circumstances, it’s not such a nice thing that Jesus knows my thoughts… surely He wasn’t impressed where my heart was at… but cut me some slack.. I’m exhausted…I haven’t slept since beyond the 4 hours of sleep the night before the flight. But those 4 hours don’t really count because I cried myself to sleep after I had just tucked in my 3 little minions and hugged and kissed them to death knowing I wouldn’t see them for a while. Stab. My. Heart.
So then the “food service” comes along and they put the tray down in front of me and I look at my friend, Chrissy, and all we can say to each other is “I don’t think we’re in Kansas anymore”… what the heck was this stuff???????????? Let the starving begin…Oh. My. Word.
Our delay leaving San Fran of course caused us to be delayed getting in to Tokyo which means we missed our connecting flight to Beijing by an hour. Super! They shuttled us to a hotel just in time for the midnight buffet {ok, honestly I have no idea what time it was or what day it was for that matter… but it was dark and I was tired} and the only thing I could identify was white rice and Coca Cola.
After we snapped pictures in front of the cardboard Jackie Chan cut out in the lobby we headed to our rooms hoping and praying for some sleep before the next leg of our journey.
Now, we were told that toilets in Japan were something special. These darn things have remote controls and play music …quite impressive. Not that one should play around with toilet bowls but when we got to our room we also got a bit curious so I went in to go tinkle and Chrissy was just outside the door. I started pressing buttons and beyond musical options, low and behold water started shooting out of the bowl to clean my bottom side and there was nothing I could press to get it to shut off… I couldn’t get up or my back would have gotten drenched {and the bathroom} so I just sat there crying I was laughing so hard as was my dear friend outside the door attempting to give me advice on how I might shut this off {and taking a video of my laughing/crying meltdown sounds at the same time}!!! It seemed it was a combo of buttons that did the trick and soon I was free from this backside wash and all I can say is, why isn’t toilet paper enough, peeps?
So we got to bed to which I NEVER fell asleep…dear Lord help me… how long have I been awake? Off we go to the airport to board our nearly 4 hour flight from Tokyo to Beijing which thankfully was uneventful… it was also full of completely undesirable food and not a wink of sleep for me… Super. Duper.
We then have another layover of a few hours, it’s a really cool airport and we grabbed some food that was somewhat recognizable and then jumped on our last flight to Xiamen which was about a 3 hour trip. Nothing I cared to eat and not a wink of sleep.
We arrive and it’s dark out and there are palm trees. I am thoroughly confused. Delirious more like it. I have no idea the day or time. I am totally out of it. Hungry. Exhausted. Non-functioning. I was nearing an adult temper tantrum. According to our calculations, it was 56 hours from the time we got to the airport in Atlanta to the time we arrived in the hotel in Xiamen. 56 HOURS. Someone. Save. Me.
I was looking forward to getting to the hotel. Our leader had stayed there many times and spoke of it like it was such a lovely little establishment. Now, I do not require the Ritz Carlton when I travel but I do feel like Hampton INN is about as “roughing it” as I want to go. I wanted to nestle in to a super clean room with a cozy bed and a nice hot shower. What we entered was a VERY old and musty smelling hotel, everything was damp, the rooms had wall AC units that made sounds like one would imagine a frog makes when it’s dying, the humidity was thick and there were mosquitos buzzing around {but so sweet of them to provide a mosquito coil to light and protect us through the night}. I launched myself on to the bed only to realize it was more like a sheet of plywood wrapped in cotton batting…no.joke…OUCH…. All I’m thinking is “God, you’ve really gone a bit too far with this joke”!
I laid in bed all night, wide awake, listening to the rattling AC and buzzing mosquitos anxious for morning to arrive so I could at least get breakfast. Surely, they had tea, right? We’re in China after all! WRONG…ok, not wrong, just not really tea. It was like boiling hot water that they possibly dipped a green tea bag in for all of a ½ second. I walk down the buffet to see soy sauce marinated hard boiled eggs, rice porridge and dried fish with a creamy soy sauce poured over it. Um, where is the bacon? Sausage? Eggs? Toast? Anything that resembles REAL food? Oh Lord have mercy on my soul…I’m going to starve to death. I sprinkled a little sugar on the rice porridge and forced it down along with a refreshing cup full of tasteless hot water.
I swatted mosquitos in the shower and had to select something to wear which pretty much boiled down to whatever outfit felt the least bit moist from all the humidity.
Side note: During our first night out at dinner with one of the local missionaries, I discovered that in China there were these things called squatty potty’s… a.k.a. a hole in the ground. I never thought going to the bathroom would be so miserable and hysterical and difficult. Caught between laughing and crying… trying to hold the stall door shut or cover up the hole in the door for any onlookers and hope you didn’t forget to bring your own toilet paper! This was getting more interesting by the minute.
“Ok, God, now I am ready to go serve orphans”, I mumble under my breath {just keeping it real, folks} and off we go. It’s a short walk to the school. Each morning started with devotions with the staff. I’ve always “heard” about those people that lived places where it was NOT ok to have a bible, worship, etc. and the great extents they went to in order to worship. It’s a freedom I take for granted in the U.S. As the staff took turns each day sharing, I was in awe of their deep faith…like in awe like I never had been before. I could not wrap my mind around how deep their faith was and what lengths they went to not only deepen their own relationship with God but also to share the gospel with others without being revealed. It was a risk. A huge risk. One evening we were invited to go to the home of one of the teachers. We took cabs to an area of the town and then walked through narrow alley ways, soaking in sights and sounds and smells.
Buckets of strange looking sea creatures for sale, all sorts of dried creatures (Seahorse, anyone???), entire families piled on single scooters…
And this sweet couple offered us some fresh eel. They’ll cut the head off right there in front of you and you can carry it home in a little baggy while it’s still wiggling!
I am short on words to describe it all.
We finally arrived at the teacher’s apartment. It’s a tiny kitchen with a table & sofa in it, a bedroom and a bathroom. How spoiled are we back home? A one burner stove, tiny fridge… and yet a massive feast was set before us. They wanted to bless us. The food kept coming and coming…shrimp with eyeballs still staring at me…I learned to hide things under rice. I observed things you just don’t see in the U.S…. when kids are potty training {diapers are too expensive} they were “split pant” and literally just use the bathroom wherever they may be like in the hallway outside the apartment door. Watch your step! When we left we wandered more through this enchanting town… seeming more like a movie set and my bladder was screaming…not good timing! So we stopped at a pre-school {these schools are open until after midnight since store/restaurant hours go so late and children need a place to be looked after}…
It was an “experience” to say the least… little miniature potty’s for the girls and what looked like a little tile mote for the boys to potty in together and then of course the “teachers squatty potty”. When you gotta go, you gotta go!
I went about each day helping get the kids dressed in the morning. Honestly there were many that you weren’t sure if they were a boy or girl until you got them undressed and changed because they buzz cut their hair to keep down on critters. I helped feed them and play with them, assisted the therapists, cleaned, etc. I had the first few days wondering why me? Why did God call me to this? What difference was I making? And then…the baby came in with a club foot and I broke. A child, a baby girl, given away because of a club foot. Please say it isn’t so. My little dude was born with one {read here} and I just could not fathom making that decision. It can be easy to quickly judge: How could they…don’t they love their baby…why… what kind of person are you…don’t they know you can fix the foot? The questions raced through my head… but I knew the answers…we’d heard the stories, the statistics… the reasons. It was the culture… a mama could be disowned by her family for keeping a child with a birth defect. In some eyes that child had no worth. There were mama’s and even some daddy’s that went to great lengths to try to keep their child, even went in to hiding but you can only hide for so long. The hospitals require a parent to stay with the child and any with such special needs or critical medical conditions could be there for weeks or months and that is just not an option for so many families. It’s heartbreaking but it’s just the way it is.
Another side note: Our team split in two and half way through the trip we swapped cities and it was my turn to go to Longyan {a beautiful trip through the countryside}.
It was here that we served older special needs orphans but I’ll never forget the images as I passed by the barred windows of the orphanage and saw rows of babies just lying in their cribs as I climbed the stairs to the school. I wanted to rescue them all but that’s not what I was called to do. Sometimes it’s just about 1. Just 1 child.
So, I loved on this little girl. I whispered in her ear. Held her. Loved her. Prayed over her. Assisted the physical therapist. It may seem small to many… but to me this was huge. This one child. This one child born with the same condition as my little dude. The years of therapy, surgeries, heartache that came along with this condition… but still my baby boy and this was a precious baby girl and I knew… I just knew that God was going to bless her with a family… a forever family that would embrace that little foot and get it all fixed up. While I believe that one of the biggest reasons He sent me to China was to have this experience with this one. little. girl. I know that by turning me inside out, shaking me, turning me upside down, taking my controlling tendancies away, stretching me beyond my comfort zone and putting me face to face with things that I feared or had challenges with was necessary. Necessary for me to grow. I would never have chosen them on my own. Ever.
Having the opportunity to tour Beijing, The Great Wall, Tienanmen Square and the Olympic park, shopping on the island of Gu Lang Yu, the magnificence of the Chinese countryside, the hustle and bustle of the cities, the way they lived…it was like a movie set…etc. was truly a gift that I will never forget.
The new friendships. Old friends bonded closer. And more than anything else, God used this journey to stretch me SO far outside my comfort zone and had me face multiple fears that I could hardly recognize me when I returned {and that’s not a bad thing}. When you have experiences like that and when you follow when He calls you to places unknown there are inherent blessings that come along with it. It opened my heart and mind in ways I can’t explain. It planted a yearning in my soul to go and serve internationally again and again and again. China was everything I had ever imagined and at the same time nothing like I had imagined. And if I might offer a tourist tip… If it’s an overcast day, there is no reason to bust your butt to climb any further up the Great Wall than the first gift shop where you can grab a crystal clear beautiful picture on a post card of what it looks like when you get further up!
While this post could have gone on for 100 pages easily, detailing out minute by minute what my eyes saw, what my ears heard, what my heart felt; what I wanted to share was how He called me, how un-trusting my heart was due to fears, anxieties, and all the multiple issues I had and how it ended up being one of the best 17 days of my life. This is what blind faith looks like.
Btw… I loved the translations of some of the signs over there!
When is a time you stepped out in blind faith and were stretched beyond belief?
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